When you first read the title, you probably thought, Oh yes, I hate when clients ghost me. But more and more, we’re hearing from clients who say their therapist ghosted them, and not just once. Clients are describing experiences where their therapist canceled sessions last minute, forgot scheduled appointments, stopped responding altogether, or even blocked them.
We don’t talk enough about how damaging this can be. In this era of online counseling, the flexibility of working from home can be a huge benefit. But let’s be honest, not everyone is equipped to manage the self discipline and emotional responsibility it takes to do this work from home. The convenience of working remotely should never come at the cost of consistency and professionalism.
This is a hard truth, but it must be said, if you’re in this field just for the convenience or the paycheck, you’re harming the profession as a whole. People come to therapy vulnerable, uncertain, and full of hope that someone will show up and help them navigate their pain. When they’re met with silence and rejection instead, we become another chapter in their trauma story. And that is quite frankly, unethical.
The Impact of Abandonment
Let’s not forget, we have a legal and ethical duty to our clients. If you’re still listed as a client’s provider and they can’t reach you in a crisis, you can be held liable. Even more importantly, abandoning a client, without proper notice, without referrals, without support, is damaging.
It’s easy to forget in the rush of paperwork and sessions, but our clients are putting their lives in our hands. When we disappear without explanation, it’s not just inconsiderate, it’s abandonment. And it cuts deep. If we are truly committed to doing no harm, then we need to own our responsibility, even when we’re burned out or going through our own stuff.
Take Care of Yourself, So You Can Show Up
We all carry something. Many of us entered this profession because we know pain. And yes, we often become vicariously traumatized by the stories we hold for others. That’s why we need to seek the care we give. Therapy. Supervision. Support.
Because if you’re walking into your office carrying unprocessed emotional weight, and you’re unable to separate your pain from your client’s pain, then it’s only a matter of time before it catches up. If that question makes you pause, that’s okay, it just means it’s time to prioritize your own healing.
We are not exempt from life. But we are responsible for how we show up in others’ lives. So remember why you chose this field. Honor the privilege it is to be trusted with another person’s truth. And if you ever feel yourself slipping, reach out before you check out.
You cannot pour from an empty cup, but you also cannot keep ghosting and calling it self-care.
